Image of a shih tzu puppy

“My Dearest Baui”

Image of a shih tzu puppy

My dearest Baui,

At the moment, you are lying in a state of coma on my sofa. We just came from the vet and you were scheduled to be given an antibiotic injection. As we arrived at the clinic, you threw up and then went unconscious. I was carrying you in my arms.

It was a good thing that I was with Uncle Pip because, I wouldn’t have known how to assist the vet, without him. I was trembling so hard as I carried your limp, little body. I was full of your vomit and I was trying not to panic. The vet had to inject you and give you some sugary concoction–and I really didn’t know how to properly help you.

You see, it was already so difficult to see you in that state–having to experience holding a sick dog who suddenly went into a stupor. Add that to the fact that the dog was your very own. Such a scene can easily shock anyone else, I suppose.

A lot of people mayn’t comprehend how some can get so attached to their pets. A good many mayn’t really understand that others can even view animals as family. You see, I treat you like my own little child and it hurts me, deeply, to see you this way.

I recall that first moment, two years ago, when I saw you at the store. I wasn’t planning on buying any pet–much less a dog. However, I saw you in the arms of the shop owner and I just couldn’t resist asking about you. So, the woman let me hold you. And hold you, I did.

You were so friendly. You were two months old that time and you were this cute, tiny Shih Tzu who automatically licked my chin. Yes. Back then, you were already showing signs of that sychophantic, loving behavior that’s typically seen in dogs–and in Shih Tzus, in particular. You were so cuddly–you were like a ball of soft, silky fur.

I bought you on the spot. I mean, it seemed too incongruous not to! It was love at first sight for you and me. I simply had to have you. You’ve been my little boy and my daughter’s baby brother from then on.

Now, you aren’t well. You aren’t responding to my call. I’m still waiting for you to wake up and let me know that you’re going to be fine–that you’re actually going to live. I am in tears as I write you this letter.

Some may think me stupid and childish to want to pen down such a long-winding missive for a dog. Like, how would you even read this, right? But then again, they don’t really see who you are to me. They say that friends are those who make this life worth-living. They declare that love is what keeps us all alive. You’re one of the few who gave me such abiding love and friendship. You were one of the handful who were always there–ready to be beside me through the highs and the lows.

I still need that love and that friendship, dearest. I still want to see you running around the yard, playing with your squishy toys–or if not, then just to have you healthy, happy, and here.

In truth, this is simply a sincere testament to the overwhelming kaleidoscope of emotions within me, at this very instance. To be honest, it’s also a little plea–a plea for you to hear me and open your eyes. Please, wake up–and stay alive.

Your crying mom,

┬ęDiwa

***Update (9:54am, Ph Time): Baui just passed away while I was scribbling this post. This is one of the few real-life write-ups here on my wall. Let this be a tribute to a wonderful little child. I love you, Bau-Bau!

***Originally written and published on 25 June 2018.

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