“Love Is Perfect: A Letter For The Man Who Hates Love Songs”


You say you don’t like listening to songs because love songs, specifically, talk about a love that isn’t real. You told me that when you were young, your parents used to like playing series of love songs using the music player at home and that these songs were those which shaped how you thought love was. As you got older, as you went from one relationship to the next, you realized that these songs that became your definition of love didn’t really compare to the love you experienced in these relationships. So for you, love songs weren’t worth listening to because they’ve let you believe in something that was actually non-existent and fake.

I was saddened by this. I love singing and I love music. I cannot help but listen to love songs and appreciate the multitude of emotions brought forth by them. For me, music is a language that helps us express the feelings that we cannot define most times. For me, love songs often convey the profound emotions we cannot put into our own words. For me, love songs have a way of either melting my heart to be able to love even more or crushing me into a puddle of pain. Music is an essential language to me and it has always brought me a kind of catharsis that no other thing on earth would provide.

Therefore, I wish to tell you this: My darling, songs aren’t bad at all. Music isn’t evil. Love doesn’t hurt and falling in love shouldn’t be a scary thing. Maybe the love you’ve felt and given before was what caused you this eventual disbelief in love and in music. Love, for all it is and for all it ever will be, is perfect. It is people who are imperfect. It is people who cause pain, bleeding, disappointment, rejection, and tears. Thus, it may well be that during those times when you’ve given love, you gave it to the wrong people. Perhaps, you gave it to people who did not know how to love in return; thereby, causing you grief and disillusionment. Maybe you gave love to people who were ignorant about the sanctity of love and the actions that represent real love.

You see, love is real. It exists. It is present in the most ordinary things we see around us — the boundless attention of a dog when he sees his master, the smile of a baby when he sees his mother, the tireless concern of a mother for her child, the steadfast pull of a beloved when one wants to give up, the phone call of a friend to ask if we are doing fine, the unexpected help coming from a stranger when we need a hand. All these define what real love is.

GOD IS LOVE. LOVE IS GOD.

Love is God. It is from Him that love comes from. Therefore, love is perfect because God is perfect. It is His love for all His creatures that actually keeps this world in motion and in perfect sync. His love is what continuously provides us with the reasons for our continued survival in a world full of trial and adversity.

LOVE IS POSSIBLE.

Baby, don’t you see? Love is possible. It is the sole reason for our existence. It may seem a melodramatic definition but people are wont to negate and underrate the things they do not understand. As profound as love is, it doesn’t come from people who are determined to use and throw away anything that requires utmost attention, nurture, and responsibility.

WE REJECT LOVE.

As a rule, humans are continually afraid of giving themselves to anything that may cause pain, rejection, and loss. It is a neverending vicious cycle that has started because of the imperfect make-up of the human race. Thus, we reject the possibility of a beautiful experience. We reject the presence of a love that may be ours forever.

Because we are conditioned to think that love can hurt, we unknowingly resist loving anyone totally. Because we believe in the popular notion that love leads to destruction, we stop ourselves from fully experiencing the gift of fully loving anyone and also being wholly loved in return. We fail to realize that love is a beautiful blessing.

POP CULTURE SAYS LOVE HURTS.

Present popular culture is full of the existence of pain and betrayal due to succumbing to what we have come to know as love. Our generation, in turn, unconsciously use this meter stick to determine the different relationships we have in our lives. It is a vicious cycle indeed. We enter relationships so easily and we also throw away these relationships when we feel that they aren’t anymore parallel to what we mistakenly think of as “real love”.

Pop culture teaches us to throw away anything that doesn’t serve us anymore. So, we throw away anything and everything — and then we end up alone. Isn’t it surprising then how society is now full of brokenness — broken families, broken marriages, broken friendships, broken people, broken hearts?

REAL LOVE IS PERFECT.

God is love and love is perfect. Therefore, we come full circle to the only realization there is — that love, as we know it, isn’t real love. This is because love should not hurt nor should it destroy. Being in love with someone should be a liberating experience. Being in love and being loved in return gives us that happy feeling of fulfillment and added strength. Love is a gift from God and it should then be something good.

I LOVE YOU.

So, my love, I hope that my love will show you that. I hope that my love for you will eventually show you the beauty of a real all-encompassing love. Whoever wrote the lines saying that “being in love is seeing the face of God” has said it so perfectly. This is because love, when fully experienced and given rightly, actually brings us closer to God. This is my goal for you — to love you so perfectly that you will see the beauty of what it means to find the perfect person in your life. We have a lifetime together and I want to show you the wonders of a love marked only by peace, laughter, friendship, and devotion.

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